I was going to tell you a story…

I was going to tell you a story…

But I showered instead.

The four day old crust was begging to be sloughed off.

Then I was going to tell you a story again…

But I ate something.

I’ve learned to shove my face when I have any spare moment – a wild animal.

Then, this one time, I was going to tell you a story…

But with the sleepy sleepy I fell.

I am a bottom dweller on Maslow’s pyramid of needs.

“breathing, food, water, sex, sleep, homeostasis, excretion”

You’d be surprised at the ones I’m missing.

I have a story for you.

In fact, I have five.

But the sleepy sleepy is calling again…

or maybe personal hygiene should take precedence…

and that glass of water is too far…

forget it…

I hear a baby crying anyway.

Or is that me?

I’ve got so many stories for you.

But at this moment…

excretion wins.



12 responses to “I was going to tell you a story…”

  1. Excretion wins, every time.

    We’ll wait patiently for the stories, you know we will.

  2. Dixie says:

    You never fail to so accurately express everything us mommy’s feel but don’t know how to tell. And in so few words.
    When people tell me, “Don’t worry, it gets better down the road.” I always think, and just how the hell does that help right now?!

    Oh, and about personal hygeine ranking on the to-do list, my hubs sometimes straight bullies me into taking a shower until I stomp off angrily to get one, thinking he should shut up and just let me be because there is no way he possibly realizes how tired I am. But the moment that hot water hits I always forgive him for pointing out my stinky hair. So… go take a shower. Please.

  3. Terram says:

    When my youngest was a baby (and even now sometimes, even though she’s 2 1/2), I admit that I would “hold it” until my husband got home, then announce I had to go to the bathroom, sneak a book in the bathroom, lock the door, turn on the fan (universal symbol for #2), and enjoy having such a wonderful excuse to sit quietly for 15 (20? 30!?) minutes. Don’t bother mommy, she’s gotta poop. No guilt at neglecting my duties, cause everybody’s gotta poop. Can’t fix dinner, nurse the baby, change a diaper, clean anything, kiss a boo boo, referee a kid fight, because I’ve GOT TO POOP. So if you have the opportunity to poop with the door closed and without a little one sitting by your feet, enjoy it. And don’t feel bad if you need to pretend you’re constipated.

    • Jenni Chiu says:

      I have done the exact same thing! You’re a woman after my own heart. But I never get away with 20 minutes… It’s 10 tops before someone’s pounding on the door.
      My husband, however can poop for an hour… I swear he takes a nap in there.

  4. ChiIL Mama says:

    Ah yes…..I remember those early days well. They don’t tell you about the sheer exhaustion or 3/4 of the world wouldn’t reproduce!! And somehow, two isn’t twice the work–it’s expands exponentially. It does get easier, tho. The years fly by and eventually they are both in school and you can shower and eat without someone on you or needing something every minute. Yes……..sleep while you can. Stories will keep.

  5. Venus says:

    Now that I have more sense, excretion usually wins. 😉 That wasn’t always the case when my little one was a newborn… and I had a VERY unhappy GI because of it. 😛

  6. John says:

    One of my favorite blog posts was written, laptop on my lap, during a #2.

  7. Mommakiss says:

    Stories? Who needs them. Post a damn picture already.

  8. I miss showering so much! I hear you woman. You have so many stories to tell. In due time, my friend!

  9. I look forward to your stories! But your hierarchy of needs is, well, important. 🙂

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