Remember this post – Think For Me. Thank you. - where I asked you to pick from my incomprehensible notes on what I should write about? Some of you picked one in the comments, some of you over Facebook, and a lot of you on Twitter. Thank you for taking pity on a swollen pregnant woman and thinking for me.
I have come to one conclusion:
You are perverts.
The clear winner from the poll was this note right here:
Keep your tongue out of my Internet
Now, I swim in the social media ocean every day. I’ve built a lot of relationships online, and would say that over 85% of my communication with the world is done digitally. But part of the reason I like this digital world so much is because I can feel close to you guys without having to BE close to you guys. It’s the perfect little place for someone with social anxiety.
I know I tell you all that I love you – because I do.
But I feel no physical attraction to you… well, most of you. I do not need or want to know what your tongue feels like.
Japanese scientists (leave it to the kinky Japanese) are exploring the idea of “tactile communication” over the Internet. In fact, they have developed a machine that could allow people to French Kiss through their computers.
The idea is that long distance couples can use it to feel close to one another. I, however think it would most likely be used by people who are not in relationships and can’t find people to french kiss them in real life. It would be like Chat Roulette only grosser.
Right now scientists are still in the beginning stages, and the prototype looks ridiculous… but it’s functional, and could become a reality very soon.
* The news of this actually broke a few months ago. I can’t believe none of you told me about it.
I love the Internet.
Keep your tongue out of it.