I have been suffering from serious insomnia.
I mean serious.
I don’t think I’ve slept since the latter part of 2009.
So all in all, I’m very happy that I remember having a dream last night. But, I was also awake to the fact that I was dreaming. I don’t know if I should feel cheated… or enlightened.
But here ya go:
***** ***** *****
I look down and see my arm reaching for a head of cabbage in the grocery store aisle. I accidentally drop it, and it starts rolling.
I think to myself, “Great- I’m not taking home that cabbage, it’s dirty now.” But I chase it sown the aisle, because I should put it back where it belongs, so someone else can take home the dirty cabbage. I finally catch up to it, and bend down to pick it up.
I stand back up (I don’t know why- but in slow motion), and the grocery store aisles have all moved around. It’s like the magic staircase in the Harry Potter stories, and I can’t find the place where the cabbage should go.
Suddenly, I hear whispering, and turn around to see two women looking at me and giggling.
I look down toward the checkout line, and the cashier is staring at me and cackling. He’s laughing so hard that drool is coming out of his mouth.
Then I hear another man laughing, and spin around to see an old man sitting on a cow right next to me. He’s giggling like a school girl.
I’m starting to feel cold, and get the shivers.
I yell down the aisle to the two women, “What is everyone laughing at?”
The old man on the cow starts tapping me on the right butt cheek with his bony index finger.
I realize he is touching bare skin.
I look down and see that I am completely naked in the frozen food aisle. (I also have slightly larger breasts- but that is beside the point).
At this point, I realize I’m dreaming and become annoyed at the cliche-ness of it all.
I say to the old man, “Really? A fucking naked dream?”.
I then put the cabbage next to a frozen pizza and yell to everybody, “If you’re trying to embarrass me, it’s not gonna work! I have a toddler! I’ve been shamed in public on many occasions!”
I then walk up to the cow, pet him on the head, bend down and whisper in his ear, “This dream is stupid”.
Then I wake up.
***** ***** *****
I dunno.
You tell me.
cabbage and big boobs go hand in hand, mylady. it's stuffed into sports bras after being chilled for hours to offer pain relief and take down swelling when weaning off the teet. as for the bum, sounds like some sort of vulnerability being expressed. perhaps you want your ass tapped a little more often…
i know, i'm brilliant. you're welcome.
It\’s all becoming so clear…
And now I miss the days of cabbage boobs. *sigh*
I love that you were awake during your dream. I too have bouts of insomnia and the lines of awake and asleep get really blurred sometimes. Girl ,you need an ambien and a good nights sleep! I do think it is fab how you made your boobs slightly bigger in your dream:) It was your dream. I would've made my boob back in their rightful place and maybe a nice firm ass ( as I have never had one, I'm not sure I'd even know where to begin to conjure one up:) Happy dreaming!
Hey, where's the Dr.Seuss story? Did I miss it?
My recent post Love Letter to My 13 year old Self
No- you did not miss it! I still don\’t have 50 words. Can you believe it?!
I suffer from major insomnia too–an all night sleepover with 150 kids will cure that! I wonder what Fraud would say about your dream, but I think it is hysterical!
My recent post Creative Tuesday: October 26: Perfect
I vote for an ambien too!
And I used to have a dream symbols book somewhere (you know, the ones on sale for 50 cents at the register at Barnes and Noble?) but seems I have misplaced it. Weird that the old man was riding a cow. Almost made me think of Chick Fil A.
Funny that you were annoyed at how clichéd it was! I used to dream all of the time that I was naked in class and had clothes to put on but I couldn’t find a place to put the clothes on, so I just continued being naked. Haven’t had that one in a while.
xo Erin
LOL—I love it! Too funny! Your dream could actually have passed for an old Adam Sandler movie!! I suffered from insomnia also, took Ambien—saw a circus when I would get up at night to go to the bathroom—so, as neat as that was, stopped taking the Ambien and switched to Melatonin. It’s natural and there isn’t a creepy circus in my bedroom every night!
Melatonin sooo did not work for me. But I am definitely anti- circus in my bedroom. No one likes to clean up elephant poop.
Well…blame it on the sleep deprivation…I’m sure it’s R.E.M rebound. I don’t sleep well either…my dreams are all screwed up. One of my besties was wrestling crocodiles the other night….ummmm, whatever!
My recent post Mirror Mirror on the Wall
I feel for you and the insomnia. How in the world are you coping?
Came over from SITS to say hi.
OMGosh! Soo funny. I don't know what the best part was… old man on cow? bigger than normal boobs? Pissed about a the dream?
(You are a few people above me at SITS roll call today!)
My recent post Blake8217s 1st day
Momma, your dreams are freakin me out!! I can't help it!
My recent post Wickedly Ghoulish
Yeah- I can’t deal. Don’t be suprised if you see an old man on a cow when you fall asleep.
I sent him your way.
LMAO…. i hate it when i have freaky dreams.
insomnia SUCKS… i have it all the time!!
Thanks for stopping by
My recent post Wordless Wednesday
I started hypnotherapy for my insomnia. It’s bizarre but it might be something to consider if all else fails!