Mostly Into The New Year Resolutions

It’s March, my friends – that time of the year when at least 70% of New Year’s resolution makers have let their resolutions go.*  I knew I didn’t want to be one of the 70%, so… um… I just didn’t make any.  However, now that we are well into the year, I am starting to feel left out and would like to jump on the bandwagon that most people already fell off.

For the most part, resolutions seem to fall under the self improvement category.  I think that’s why most of them fail – it’s really really hard to be the one to hold yourself accountable for bettering yourself.  When there is no one there to give you a pat on the back, it’s difficult to keep going.  Everyone else is too busy with their own stuff to check in with you and make sure your keeping up your new exercise plan, or giving up soda, or keeping your house cleaner.

I want to get my resolutions right, so instead of self improvement, I’m going to go for things that will improve life for others.  In fact, I think you should all join me in these resolutions… that way we can hold each other accountable.  This year’s resolutions will not be about making myself better – they will be about making the world better.**

I present to you my Mostly Into The New Year Resolutions: 

• I resolve not to be the slow car driving in the fast lane, or worse yet – the only lane.
• I resolve to hold the door open for anyone with their hands full, regardless of how late I am.
• I resolve  to pick up my dog’s poo… AND, get this – another dog’s poo if it is right next to mine.
• I resolve never to write an email in ALL CAPS.
• I resolve to open my candy or chips before the movie or stage show starts.
• I resolve not to be the drunkest one at the party.
• I resolve to tell someone if they have food in their teeth.
• I resolve not to yell into my bluetooth at the drugstore.
• I resolve to ask everyone in the elevator what floor they are going to if I am the one in front of all the buttons.
• I resolve not to pass gas in said elevator.

Tell me you’re with me and together we can make drivers, dog walkers, and elevator riders happier people.  Hell, that’s pretty much the whole world.

What’s your Mostly Into The New Year Resolution?