Stop talking about a Zombie Apocalypse… So I can prepare for the Zombie Apocalypse.
Zombies are the new vampires…
except not as sexy…
I usually get burned out quickly on whatever the latest fad or popular fantasy is. I loved the show True Blood until everyone else loved the show True Blood. I got burned out on the Twilight saga so fast that I couldn’t even bring myself to see it. I’m so tired of hearing about the book Fifty Shades of Grey that I took that color out of my son’s crayon box. Perhaps it’s because I’m afraid that if I do experience these things after all the tremendous hype, I’ll be disappointed. Perhaps I have a need to not be like everyone else. Perhaps it’s the rebel in me. Perhaps I have an exaggerated fear of being brainwashed.
At this moment in time, I am sick of hearing about the Zombie Apocalypse, but not for my usual reasons.
Right now everyone should stop talking about it because
Have you people not heard of “creating your own reality”? The laws of attraction could seriously bite us in the ass here. I’m afraid that all our forms of media are like one giant vision board, and that every time “zombie apocalypse” is trending online, a new herd of zombies is made.
People are chewing each other’s faces off in Miami. A college student ate his roommate’s heart and brains in Maryland. The Mayans have predicted the end of the world in 2012, and people are betting on zombies being the cause.
Can we please shut up about it? It’s starting to incite panic. Soon people will start walking around with guns and bows and arrows like they do on AMC. Shooting lessons will triple in cost – let’s face it, you can’t just point and shoot in the general direction of a zombie. It has to be the head, people. The prices on non perishable foods will sky rocket, and people will start hoarding water and buying horses.
Stop talking about it!
Let’s go back to vampires and things that sparkle.
That way my husband can finnish his plans for our underground shelter without paying too much for the materials.
That way I can buy a gun (which I never thought I’d do), and I can cleverly disguise it as switching parties and becoming a republican.
Let’s all pretend the world is a shiny happy place, and get phrases like “overabundance of money” or “glazed doughnuts” trending online.
Truly, if the media is really creating one giant vision board, let’s attract doughnuts…
lots and lots of doughnuts.
PS- If one of you buys this for me, I will save you a spot in our shelter.